I have been meaning to post about some unusual experiences that we have found ourselves in as parents of a toddler. I am quite sure that others have experienced similar misadventures with their little one; but this journey in parenthood is new for me...so I would like to post a few random thoughts and events that surround something that we rarely discuss openly with others: deification or #2 (as children call it).
This will be a series of about 3 short stories...
The first story starts something like this...I had just finished washing and drying Simret's diapers (she wears cloth diapers) and noticed a fowl smell coming from inside the dryer. The smell is hard to describe...but I will try...it smelled like burnt turds. (Now throughout this post I will use various words for deification-as I know that some people are offended by sh*t and some hate poop-so, I guess I will equally offend all at some point during this post, and for that I apologize up front?). So, back to the story...all of the diapers that I removed from the dryer smelled horrible. In fact, the whole basement had this horrid smell. I couldn't quite figure it out-as this has never happened with past washings of her diapers. So, I decided that maybe I should wash them again? I loaded the clean diapers that reeked of burnt poop back into the washer (we bought a new front-loader washer and dryer when we decided to go with cloth diapers-it even has a special setting called "baby wash" that uses scalding hot water to wash them-not sure I could have continued with cloth diapers with this washer and dryer). While they were washing, I used bleach to clean the dryer to try to get rid of that smell. I was still puzzled by the cause of the smell, as the diapers looked clean and there was nothing in the dryer causing the smell? After I washed them, I put them back into the clean dryer. Once they had finished drying, I opened the dryer only to find the same horrific smell? Perplexed, I started to fold the diapers, because Simret was on her last diaper and I was getting frustrated. Well, I was down to folding the last couple of diapers and wouldn't you know it...there was a perfectly round, large stool sitting on top of one of the diapers-which I apparently missed while throwing the diapers back into the washer. So, when someone tells you that "you cannot polish a turd" they are right! (for those of you that have never heard this saying and think that it is tasteless...I am sorry, but I did grow up in Wyoming?). The conclusion to this story, is that I learned that it was possible to wash and dry a turd twice without much damage to the stool itself? The lesson learned from this event, never and I mean never forget to wash off the diapers or get lazy and think "the washer will take care of it" before putting them in the diaper pale to be washed. The actual ironic part is that it took another turd washing event before I learned this lesson; yes, about 3 months later I washed and dried her stool twice again? You would have thought that the first time I did this would have been traumatic enough not to repeat?
On a side note, I have been washing Simret's diapers for over a year now. Something that I am very proud of, as most of my family and some friends thought that I could not hack it. In fact, one family member's (you know who you are) said, "I give her three months and she will be using disposables." So, as I tell you about my misadventures in washing diapers realize that I have been washing them twice a week for over a year and have only done this twice.
Story #2 of 3 in "The Potty Monologues" will follow in the next couple of days.
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